“I could not locate gloves, but after cutting my fingernails and coating my fingers in the Vaseline I’d purchased at the deli along with my egg sandwich, I located the tampon. “
I think my mind had entertained this notion, though somehow I expected that gravity, intent as it was on imposing its will on the rest of me, would have expelled the thing by now. But no, on further reflection, it made sense. I didn’t work on the rest of me like I performed Kegels. There wasn’t a whole lot else I could do, sitting on the couch all day. I pondered buying lube and rubber gloves and a six-pack of beer and attempting to dig it out right then. But it had been there nine days, and the primaries were on. I bought only beer. [Moe, Jezebel.com]
I am both very glad that I do not have a vagina and very sorry that anyone who does must face the possibility of experiencing this, or probably something milder.
This does, however, only make me like Moe more and really want to drink with her. A lot.
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